3 down, 1 to go

I had my 3rd round of chemo on December 26. Once again, it was better than the time before. However, I get tired quicker too. Still have the diarrhea, nausea, numbness, no taste buds, etc. Pretty much sucks. But, a little over a week after treatment and I was feeling a lot better. Today, I feel really good. Of course, I have my last round of chemo next Thursday, so, naturally I feel good.

One good thing is that the Monday following treatment is Martin Luther King Jr. day. So, I won't have to take the day off if I'm sick. Pretty sorry that I look forward to having a holiday so I can be sick without taking off work to do it. Oh well, such is life.

My doctor told me that I will start radiation therapy 3 weeks after my chemo is finished. I will go 5 days a week for 6 weeks. Woo hoo! More fun. I don't know if I can take much more of the happy happy joy joy. Crispy boob. At least I will finally get a tattoo. They will tattoo a small dot on my breast to show where the beam of radiation is sent.

Now come on, I know what you're thinking. "I want a tattoo too!" I'm wondering if they would consider putting a nice flower around the dot to make it look spiffy. Something to cover up the beautiful scar I already have on that breast. I will say this though. That scar is the most attractive one I have now. The one under my arm and the one from my port are pretty hideous. But the one on my breast has healed nicely.

One thing I can't tolerate is not being able to feel cold right after chemo. I mean in my mouth. Anything I drink that is supposed to be cold, is lukewarm. Pretty nasty when you're drinking a soda. So, I have to stay away from soda for about a week after treatment. Hot stuff is great. Tastes hot. I can tolerate milk and orange juice.

About a week after my last treatment I decided I couldn't take it anymore. I needed some ice cold water. When I took a drink I started crying. I could feel the cold! Tim couldn't understand why I was crying. But, the frustration level just gets so high. I feel so helpless to help myself. You're nauseous so you can't eat much of anything even though you're hungry. You crave an ice cold pop or water and can't drink it because it's flat disgusting when it hits your mouth. You sit on the couch and watch "What Not to Wear" and cry because you want nothing more than a makeover, but you haven't got any damn hair to make over.

I totally understand why people have to go on anti-depressants during treatment. Especially if they are doing more than 4. At least I know I've only got one more and I'll be done. It make me sick to think about having 4-5 more. That's the only thing that's kept me from taking an anti-depressant.

Here's a funny story though. That same day I was on the couch crying while watching "What Not to Wear," Tim had went to pick Kati up from work because of the ice. T.J. heard me crying and came flying into the living room. He asked why I was crying and I cried some more and told him I was ugly. He told me I wasn't and fell quiet. After a few minutes of listening to me blubber, he said, "Well, I think dad can handle this when he gets home." Then he promptly went back in his room. If I hadn't been so busy blubbering, I would have died laughing. And, yes, dad came home and fixed it. He changed the channel.

So, anyway, next Thursday, January 17, is my last chemo treatment. I won't be sorry to say goodbye to the wonderful nurses who take care of me there. Hopefully, I will never see them again.