Time and date is set. I will have surgery November 8 to implant my port. Then I will start chemo on November 9. They said the chemo will take about 2 hours, 1 hour for each drug. I am only taking the taxotere and cytoxan. I will do 4 rounds, 1 every 3 weeks. Hopefully, it won't be too bad. However, the onco does say I will more than likely lose my hair. So, I'm gong to try chemaid and see if it works anyway. It can't hurt.
Also, I had an echocardiogram Friday. It came back ok. Nothing major. Just a little mitral valve regurgitation. I've been all through that. My daughter has it.
So, I will post when I know more.
Monday, October 29, 2007
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Our decision
Well, we've made our decision. I told Tim and Kati that I realize this decision basically rests with me, but I couldn't make it myself. I needed my family to help me by giving me their input and desire. As I said before, Kati decided 80% isn't acceptable. So, needless to say, she wants me to have the chemo. Tim and I were undecided until Friday.
I called my onco to see where I fall in the intermediate range. If it's closer to low or closer to high. We felt that would help us with our decision. I found out my number in the Oncotype test is 25. 1-18 is low, 18-31 is intermediate, and 31 and above is high. That really helped. Not. 25 falls almost perfectly in the middle. Except for it's 1 unit closer to high.
So, I called Tim to tell him what my number is and as we talked we made our decision. We realized the thought of it reappearing in the next 10 years was frightening. Especially since it can come back in a different organ. We also realized our first grandbaby would be less than 10 years old if it happened. Not to mention I will probably have another 1 or 2 by then. The thought of something even worse happening that could possibly kill me and I have to leave not only my husband and children, but grandchildren as well pushed it over the edge.
I absolutely cannot wait until Avalyn arrives. That baby has no idea how much she is loved already. Her grandma and grandpa are positively giddy with excitement.
So, with all of the variables involved, we decided I needed to do everything in my power to survive. If it does reappear in the next 10 years I can safely say I did what I could. I will have no guilt and I won't be kicking myself.
Tim said when you really look at the grand scheme of things, worrying about the side effects is stupid. He didn't like the word stupid, but it really fits. Is being fatigued and possibly losing my hair really worth risking the beast coming back to haunt me in a few years? No, it's not. And, unfortunately, it wouldn't be the breast beast. I could handle that. I don't want to even think about it getting to my brain.
I'm calling my onco in the morning to give him our decision. He wants to start treatment in the next two weeks. So, I'll be having surgery to implant my port and then start chemo very quickly.
I called my onco to see where I fall in the intermediate range. If it's closer to low or closer to high. We felt that would help us with our decision. I found out my number in the Oncotype test is 25. 1-18 is low, 18-31 is intermediate, and 31 and above is high. That really helped. Not. 25 falls almost perfectly in the middle. Except for it's 1 unit closer to high.
So, I called Tim to tell him what my number is and as we talked we made our decision. We realized the thought of it reappearing in the next 10 years was frightening. Especially since it can come back in a different organ. We also realized our first grandbaby would be less than 10 years old if it happened. Not to mention I will probably have another 1 or 2 by then. The thought of something even worse happening that could possibly kill me and I have to leave not only my husband and children, but grandchildren as well pushed it over the edge.
I absolutely cannot wait until Avalyn arrives. That baby has no idea how much she is loved already. Her grandma and grandpa are positively giddy with excitement.
So, with all of the variables involved, we decided I needed to do everything in my power to survive. If it does reappear in the next 10 years I can safely say I did what I could. I will have no guilt and I won't be kicking myself.
Tim said when you really look at the grand scheme of things, worrying about the side effects is stupid. He didn't like the word stupid, but it really fits. Is being fatigued and possibly losing my hair really worth risking the beast coming back to haunt me in a few years? No, it's not. And, unfortunately, it wouldn't be the breast beast. I could handle that. I don't want to even think about it getting to my brain.
I'm calling my onco in the morning to give him our decision. He wants to start treatment in the next two weeks. So, I'll be having surgery to implant my port and then start chemo very quickly.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
2nd Opinion
We got our 2nd opinion today. He was really sharp, very knowledgeable. We liked him real well. He gave us an indepth analysis of what's going on and my options. I have several things in my favor:
1) My lymph node was negative for cancer
2) My tissue that was sent for testing showed "intermediate risk" for recurrence in 10 years. That's in my favor because it wasn't high risk.
3) My estrogen receptors are positive
Things that are not in my favor:
1) My tumor was grade 3 - meaning more aggressive
2) My growth rate was fast
One things that can be considered good or bad is the size of the tumor - 2.1 CM. That is considered medium. But anything over 1cm typically requires chemo.
If I do radiation on top of my surgery, that gives me an 80% cure rate. 20% chance of it coming back. Of course, "coming back" is not really the proper term. He said that not only can cancer move through your lymph system, it can also move through your blood. So, if even one small cancer cell broke off and moved through my blood stream, it's possible for it to show up again in another part of my body. Such as, liver, uterus, bones, lungs, brain, etc. Not good.
He made it clear that it's a no brainer to have radiation. Without it, he can't even tell me what my chances of cure are. But, they're low. WITH radiation, I have 3 options:
1) Chemo only - that brings my percentage up to 88%
2) Tamoxifen only - that brings my percentage up to 83%
3) both - that brings my percentage up to 90%
We did ask him about the heart damage issue. He said it can be an issue with adriamycin usage, but he wouldn't even consider giving me that drug with my "great" prognosis. He said heart damage occurred in about 2% of patients using that drug.
I would have to get a port surgically installed, then have chemo every 3 weeks for 3 months. A total of 4 times. Side effects can be:
nausea/vomiting
weight gain (yeah, I really need that)
weak and tired
hair loss
sores in mouth
muscle aches and pains
funny looking nails
excessive eye watering
neuropathy (not reversible)
leukemia (<1%)
allergic reactions (that can be controlled with other medication)
increase in the risk of serious infections such as pneumonia.
He said he would support us in whatever decision we make, but he thinks chemo, radiation, and tamoxifen would be the best course because I'm so young. He told us to take this weekend and think about it, then call him Monday to let him know what we want to do. Typically, they want to start some form of treatment within 2 months of surgery. I'm 2 weeks away from that anniversary.
For the first time since this whole thing started, I'm really scared. Not of the treatment, of the recurrence. It showing it's ugly head again in a few years somewhere else in my body gives me chills. I just have no idea what I'm going to do. Kati wants me to do it. She says 80% isn't good enough. I just want God to point me in the right direction.
All prayers are requested and appreciated.
1) My lymph node was negative for cancer
2) My tissue that was sent for testing showed "intermediate risk" for recurrence in 10 years. That's in my favor because it wasn't high risk.
3) My estrogen receptors are positive
Things that are not in my favor:
1) My tumor was grade 3 - meaning more aggressive
2) My growth rate was fast
One things that can be considered good or bad is the size of the tumor - 2.1 CM. That is considered medium. But anything over 1cm typically requires chemo.
If I do radiation on top of my surgery, that gives me an 80% cure rate. 20% chance of it coming back. Of course, "coming back" is not really the proper term. He said that not only can cancer move through your lymph system, it can also move through your blood. So, if even one small cancer cell broke off and moved through my blood stream, it's possible for it to show up again in another part of my body. Such as, liver, uterus, bones, lungs, brain, etc. Not good.
He made it clear that it's a no brainer to have radiation. Without it, he can't even tell me what my chances of cure are. But, they're low. WITH radiation, I have 3 options:
1) Chemo only - that brings my percentage up to 88%
2) Tamoxifen only - that brings my percentage up to 83%
3) both - that brings my percentage up to 90%
We did ask him about the heart damage issue. He said it can be an issue with adriamycin usage, but he wouldn't even consider giving me that drug with my "great" prognosis. He said heart damage occurred in about 2% of patients using that drug.
I would have to get a port surgically installed, then have chemo every 3 weeks for 3 months. A total of 4 times. Side effects can be:
nausea/vomiting
weight gain (yeah, I really need that)
weak and tired
hair loss
sores in mouth
muscle aches and pains
funny looking nails
excessive eye watering
neuropathy (not reversible)
leukemia (<1%)
allergic reactions (that can be controlled with other medication)
increase in the risk of serious infections such as pneumonia.
He said he would support us in whatever decision we make, but he thinks chemo, radiation, and tamoxifen would be the best course because I'm so young. He told us to take this weekend and think about it, then call him Monday to let him know what we want to do. Typically, they want to start some form of treatment within 2 months of surgery. I'm 2 weeks away from that anniversary.
For the first time since this whole thing started, I'm really scared. Not of the treatment, of the recurrence. It showing it's ugly head again in a few years somewhere else in my body gives me chills. I just have no idea what I'm going to do. Kati wants me to do it. She says 80% isn't good enough. I just want God to point me in the right direction.
All prayers are requested and appreciated.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Waiting
Well, it seems like forever since I posted. I've had calls from concerned friends, so I thought I would give some kind of update. We decided on a second opinion. I have an appointment with him on October 25. I still don't have the test results for my possibility of recurrence. And after reading some recent studies, I really don't think we're going to go the chemo route. It has been determined that chemo can weaken the heart and even lead to heart disease. Well, heart disease RUNS in my family. My dad died of it, my mom has congestive heart failure complete with a handy dandy pacemaker. So, no. With all of that, I don't really think chemo is an option. It would give me that extra 5%, but what would it take away? I could die of heart disease in 10 years because I had chemo. My husband and I have discussed this over and over. We'll talk to the new onco about it and see what he thinks. But, don't count on my hair falling out any time soon.
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